Who Fuses the Music

Learning is hard. Especially when they are things that you think you don't need to learn, things you've felt like you've already learned, or things you simply don't want to learn.

Take my leg situation for example. I can't walk.  I think I haven't been able to walk before. Yes, around this same time last year I had a knee surgery.  I was alone in a state with no family or aware friends to care for me.  I had to keep my job - and try to work without pain meds.  I had to keep my grades up and attend all classes, tests, and activities going full time at school.  I had to perform fantastically despite not being able to sleep from the pain at night, and lack of food from not being able to make it to the grocery store.  I had to walk around a huge campus with crutches at 10mph in order to make it on time to my classes. But despite all of this, my head stayed afloat.  Yes I had a few breakdowns, cutting remarks from coworkers expecting more, a few unfair points docked from tests and papers, financial troubles from missed days at work, anxiety attacks from not moving my body like how I need to for weeks on weeks, bad hair days, and long nights.  But God knew everything. And I knew that, and I tried hard at meeting all demands and even harder at having faith in Him.

And that is what makes the biggest difference.